i am very obsessed with the NYT's "Modern Love" column. so this news posted on the frisky today was v. exciting!
The New York Times‘ Modern Love column is something many simply adore—and others love to hate. Each week, readers learn intimate details about someone else’s relationship, and sometimes learn lessons about human nature, relationships, and love. The column has helped several writers launch their careers by way of book deals; now it may help The New York Times‘ wallet. Former “Sex and the City” writer Jenny Bicks is working on a pilot script for a TV show based on Modern Love—not a specific column, the whole shebang.
The show will revolve around a fictionalized male editor’s life, which includes a messy divorce, a rocky relationship with a teenage daughter, and a reentry into the dating scene. Stories and people from the newspaper column will be woven into the show’s storylines. Even though BermanBraun optioned the rights to the column from The Times last year, Bicks isn’t sure whether she’ll be able to set the series at the paper, or if it will become a fictional news organization.
Meanwhile, the real editor of Modern Love, Daniel Jones, lives in Massachusetts with his family. No word on how he feels about having his life made into a TV show.
i is in nyc. for one week. entries should be infrequent, so callmecallmecallme. i'm heading downtown right now, only to return to the upper W.H. side to sleep. first stop, target for headphones. pray for something good. after that -- wonder and wonder and dinner with wes!
M: do you have anything fun planned while you are here?
Lo: um, nothing in particular. just seeing people, eating at fave places. getting my stuff moved. its going to be weird
M: yeah, saying goodbye. im sure you'll have fun
Lo: yeah, def. bittersweet. its just funny how i was never that happy there and now that i know ive moved here ive missed it. i swear i have the worst case of the grass is greener complex.
M: that is the story of my life
Lo: oh good. well at least it isnt just me
M: hopefully one day we will get over it
"That's it. There won't ever be another Nirvana song, another Kurt Cobain performance, or another obscure artist I'll discover because of him. It was a crushing blow for pop music, for rock and roll, and for Gen X."
"I'm older now, and the all encompassing life-affirmation that kids derive from music on a daily basis is much harder to find. I've also spent the past 10-plus years writing about and covering music professionally, which can, unfortunately, zap some of the magic from the stacks of CDs I listen to every week. But I do believe that Cobain and Nirvana were pop music's last true game-changers, ushering in a scruffy, music-first rock and roll passion that almost instantaneously erased the abominations that were Winger and the rest of the Aqua Net hair metal goons."
"I think marriage is dangerous. The idea of two people trying to possess each other is wrong. I don't think the flare of love lasts. Your mind rather than your emotions must answer for the success of matrimony. It must be friendship -- a calm companionship which can last through the years." -- Carole Lombard
LoSim@lolankford -- Pinkberry and everything else ... we're waiting for you.
about 5 hours ago from web in reply to lolankford
totes bummed about the timing (i'm missing some shows in Georgia that i'd like to have seen), but still super excited about the trip. if only i had more plans nailed down, im worried im going to miss certain people...eh. i shouldnt freak out about it. it would be great, even if i dont do much.
what would you say about a boy who claims to like you but never hangs out with you during the day? do you ever find yourself in situations where if you posed the condition to a therapist or dating advice columnist, theyd tell you something is amiss, even if youre not sure it is? but if you only hang out with someone after their shows, at bars after their shows, and really late at their house ... what does that mean? youre usually in groups, they never want to go home together and they dismiss most of your day time invitations to ... do random stuff. i think it means youre a temporary and very convenient amusement. god. im so embarrassed that i just realized this. sometimes i think josh and william didnt prepare me very well for straight boys. fuck. now what?
Above all, Rainer Werner Fassbinder was a rebel whose life and art was marked by gross contradiction. Openly homosexual, he married twice; one of his wives acted in his films and the other served as his editor. Accused variously by detractors of being anti-Communist, male chauvinist, anti-Semitic and even homophobic, he completed 44 projects between 1966 and 1982, the majority of which can be characterized as highly intelligent social melodramas. His prodigious output was matched by a wild, self-destructive libertarianism that earned him a reputation as the enfant terrible of the New German Cinema (as well as its central figure.) Known for his trademark leather jacket and grungy appearance, Fassbinder cruised the bar scene by night, looking for sex and drugs, yet he maintained a flawless work ethic by day. Actors and actresses recount disturbing stories of his brutality toward them, yet his pictures demonstrate his deep sensitivity to social misfits and his hatred of institutionalized violence. Some find his cinema needlessly controversial and avant-garde; others accuse him of surrendering to the Hollywood ethos. It is best said that he drew forth strong emotional reactions from all he encountered, both in his personal and professional lives, and this provocative nature can be experienced posthumously through reviewing his artistic legacy.
"The American method of making films left the audience with emotions and nothing else; I want to give the spectator the emotions along with the possibility of reflecting on and analyzing what he is feeling."
"Part of me thinks that if I remain patient, he’ll snap out of it, get his life together, and then we’ll have a real go of it. But I also am scared to stupidly risking heartbreak again. It hurt so much the first time."
1. TEXT BACK: I’m hardly a text message stalker, though after IM, it is my favorite method of communication. I expect a man to text me back, regardless of whether he is busy with work or watching a sports game. I don’t need an epic novel in reply, because chances are I was just sayin’ hi, but acknowledging my outreach is only fair. It’s rude not to. Exceptions are always made for dead batteries and emergencies, of course. Bad moods? You only get one or two passes for that. Don’t be a baby. Be a man. I’ll care about your bad mood when it isn’t affecting your gentlemanly treatment of me.
2. GIVE ADVANCE NOTICE: Not to steal a page from The Rules, but I like dates to be scheduled in advance. I’m a busy lady—I will make plans if I don’t hear from you. And if I don’t hear from a dude until the last minute, it makes me think that he thinks I’m sitting around, always ready to meet up with him. That pisses me off. The spur of the moment date is awesome in ADDITION, but it should not replace the practice of calling many days in advance and suggesting a day to hang out. I’m no sexist, however—I think women should instigate dates as well, as often, and with the same respect.
3. HAVE A PLAN: Whoever is “in charge” of that planned-in-advance-date, should actually MAKE a plan. Take charge, show you’ve thought about what might make a good time for the two of you. Hanging out and watching crap TV is fun sometimes, but it should not replace actually, you know, dating. That is not to say dates must be expensive. My last relationship (the ex-fiance) was great with the super pricey dinner dates, but was utterly uncreative when it came to anything else. Frankly, I’d much rather a fully-planned date of free or cheap activities than a $300 meal devoid of ingenuity, but I’m not getting either right now from ol’ Chicken Parm and it is getting OLD.
4. WEEKS AND WEEKENDS: Both are important. So are nights and days. Mix it up. If a guy only wants to hang out after 10pm at night on Wednesdays, you gotta wonder what the hell he’s doing during the day and evening (is he a vampire?) or on the weekends (dating someone who’s graduated to the next level of dating?).
5. LATENESS & RUDENESS, UNACCEPTABLE, ALMOST ALWAYS: Usually lateness can be prevented. Think about it. You wake up 30 minutes after your alarm went off. You hustle to get to work on time anyway don’t you? People you’re dating deserve the same respect and commitment. The occasional bit of lateness I can excuse and I’m always happy to hear an explanation, but reoccurring lateness is a sign that your kindness is being taken advantage of, that he is being lazy in the courtesy department, and is counting on your inclination to forgive and his charm to get him out of hot water. Forget that. If he’s usually late NOW, imagine how late he’ll be in six months, or in three years when you’re having a baby and have to drive yourself to the hospital because he forgot to check his watch.
Likewise, a chivalrous gentleman should always think about how his tone and his attitude might be taken, whether or not it reflects his intentions. When I’m busy at work, and someone IMs me or calls me to chat, I might be a little irritated that I’m being bothered, but I’m always courteous and polite in my response. “I’d love to chat with you about this, but I’m in the middle of something important at work. Can I call you later?” takes only about three more seconds to type than just, “Busy.”
At the end of the day, chivalry is about one thing—pulling your head out of your own “busy,” “over-worked, “moody” hiney for just a second to think about how your actions might be interpreted by the other person. If you care about them, tweaking your actions just the slightest bit so that it takes their feelings into account, is easy, worth the effort, and will pay off BIG TIME.