general specific [chris, 3].

[it only took 50 mins, but here they are. i think. i did it all by trained ear]

If the trials at hand are really getting you down:
We had a close call,
I didn't even see it, then another one,
And I hardly believed it at all.

What the writers say, it means shit to me now,
Plants and animals,
Appear on a bender when it's 80 degrees at the end of December,
What's going on?
Only for you and me.

In a showing of hands, who's going back to the south?
Where hungry necks that I know
In running the blender in a lightning storm
Are disguised as a blessing, I'm sure.

And knowing ahead, there comes a fork in the road,
Pants have got to go.
We're on an island on the Fourth of July,
It looks like the tide is going home.

In time, I'd find a little way to your heart,
Down to the general store for nothing specific,
Gonna wash my bones in the Atlantic shore,
Only for you and me.

old coworker.

gets her gay publicity on. good piece.

michael chambers, ss.

"May we all die stark-naked, getting blowjobs from our sweethearts, and listening to Beethoven while tripping on the greatest drug in the world. May we all die fighting for our freedoms in our own special way, exerting our independence to the last dying gasp, going down in a blaze of glory with our brothers and sisters screaming not in pain, but in rapturous ecstasy and mutual rebellion, our middle fingers fully extended as the great void takes us all where we know not. A billion points of independent wonder, like sands on the seashore, defiantly standing our place as the waves crash down around us. That's not tragedy. That's victory. That's bliss. "


STEVE JOBS AT HOME IN 1982 — “This was a very typical time. I was single. All you needed was a cup of tea, a light, and your stereo, you know, and that’s what I had.” —Steve Jobs



morning saved, part sally.

not the right song just yet (having issues) but enough to slap a smile so big on my sticky face you'd swear id just been whispered lifes secrets.

real one.

but thats the thing, isnt it? despite the "alone" thing (ive been focusing on this more due to a few surprised persons in my life. and i just take that as flattery and dont dig, right?) i know the real and only reason ive gotten through these years is due to Captain Planet.

you were there when noone would listen. you believed in me when i was so sure i'd fail i had one foot on the plane already. you loved me when i hated myself. you talked to me at 3AM when i couldnt sleep. you invited me to be a part of your relationships when i couldnt get a date. you believe there is a person for me and that the waiting is only an indication of how good it'll be. you laugh at me when i dont understand social situations but then you always help me. you let atlanta be my real home and you always have a place for me.

matt -- you make me feel like a woman and that says so much. i believe because of you. and i dont know what id do without your ear, its been instrumental to me when all my girls are busy. and when theyre not, too. thanks for making me laugh.
elissa -- lil' momma. you take care of me like no man ever could. i love you to the moon and back.
lynds -- youre so much like me it scares the living daylights outta me. i love watching you blossom.
jessie -- you gave me a home and a shoulder in a time when i needed it most. we all know its really your loft i love, but thanks a million over for all your girliness and classy good taste.
sally -- my heart soars with pride for you and all youve done. youre the most kickass, awesome, HOT friend ever and i'm so in platonic love with your boyfriend, i'd just die if he werent with you!

life is so unrelenting, no?

[no paris. more to come]


trailer [chris, 2].

john updike, r.i.p.

“My subject is the American Protestant small town middle class,” Mr. Updike told Jane Howard in a 1966 interview for Life magazine. “I like middles,” he continued. “It is in middles that extremes clash, where ambiguity restlessly rules.”

arts beat.


i miss this bitch!

In Defense of First-Date Sex
January 23, 2009 5:05 PM by Diana Vilibert

First-date sex seems to be the dating debate du jour everywhere I look. Our dating blogger Rich Santos debated the topic with his sister Emily — though it wasn't much of a debate. They both seem to be in agreement: First-date sex is a no-no if you want a relationship outside of the bedroom with your bed-mate. Emily is all for first-meeting sex, just as long as both people are aware and okay with the fact that it may or may not turn into something more. But when it comes to dating, she says, "I’d advise to take it slowly, although part of me would like to shout, 'Women’s liberation — do what you want and be empowered!'"

Did I miss the memo that the decision to have first-date sex (or not) is now a statement you are making on behalf of all women? Empowerment comes from control and power over your own sex life and decisions, and confidence in those choices, whether or not they align with popular opinion. I happen to be a fan of first-date sex — but I don't really expect or want a standing ovation for feeling this way. But neither Emily's viewpoint or mine makes either of us a lesser feminist, and neither of us, I'm sure, means to speak for all women. If I wake up tomorrow morning to find that celibacy is all the rage, I wouldn't feel empowered by keeping my legs closed — and there's no reason anyone should feel empowered by treating sex as a fun, casual thing if they don't feel that it is for them.

But according to Rich, I've been going about it the wrong way, since "Guys like to pursue and feel like they’ve accomplished something when courting a girl...You are a prize, but no one out there deserves to be an instant winner!"

You know, I don't think I want to date a guy who pats himself on the back when he finally wins the "prize" of having sex with me. Newsflash: women like to have sex, too. We don't begrudgingly disrobe after you've passed a series of tests during a "courtship" period, so please refrain from giving yourself a mental high-five when we sleep with you.

Rich, I must know, at what point during this courtship process do you generally take home your prize? Your argument about intimacy ["People should have to earn that intimacy and people should also value that intimacy is at least somewhat sacred."] is all fine and good if you're waiting months to sleep with a girl and she feels the same way, but the word "intimacy" gets thrown around haphazardly when we're talking about sex. There are people who think kissing can be more intimate than sex--should they wait until they've been dating someone for months before kissing them, lest they haven't earned that intimacy?

And when is it "earned" — the fifth date? After you meet each other's parents? In between the appetizer and the main course? Or maybe it's different for everyone and can happen at different points with different people. You can date someone for months and feel like you barely know them, and you can feel connected to someone minutes after meeting them — who is anyone to decide that people who have sex on the first date value emotional intimacy any more or less than people who have sex on the third date, 10th date, or after walking down the aisle?

thanks for empowering the words.

wsn, nyu.

what i learned from movies, 2008.

bbc music.

check it.

NYU oscar noms.

this years alums...


f. scott fitzgerald

It’s not a slam at you when people are rude, it’s a slam at the people they’ve met before.



I love people. Everybody. I love them, I think, as a stamp collector loves his collection. Every story, every incident, every bit of conversation is raw material for me. My love’s not impersonal yet not wholly subjective either. I would like to be everyone, a cripple, a dying man, a whore, and then come back to write about my thoughts, my emotions, as that person. But I am not omniscient. I have to live my life, and it is the only one I’ll ever have. And you cannot regard your own life with objective curiosity all the time…



got interviewed. loveher.

bachelor hilarity.

no shame, i love the bachelor. and so did a few people i used to work with. one of those people, kristen baldwin, is blogging about the show on EW.com. and its fucking hilarious.

"So nope, I'm not going to get worked up about it. Fool me once, Bachelor producers, shame on you. Fool me 12 seasons in a row... Good God, what happened to my life?"

Ry says goodbye.

"never become that if you choose this path- if you go this route with your art. never listen to those loud dissatisfied bystanders who only want to see you fail because that will be entertaining for that moment. hold fast to your dreams, hold faster to your heart and never step out of the light of that love that made you whole. i did. and i know better now. and better late than never i suppose"

get it while its there.


quote-o, fave-o.

(found this as an intro to an old story i wrote for a tween site that is still the most commented thing i've ever produced)

Alyssa: You know, I didn't just heed what I was taught, men and women should be together, it's the natural way, that kind of thing. I'm not with you because of what family, society, life tried to instill in me from day one. The way the world is, how seldom it is that you meet that one person who just gets you - it's so rare. My parents didn't really have it. There were no examples set for me in the world of male-female relationships. And to cut oneself off from finding that person, to immediately halve your options by eliminating the possibility of finding that one person within your own gender, that just seemed stupid to me. So I didn't. But then you came along. You, the one least likely. I mean, you were a guy. And while I was falling for you I put a ceiling on that, because you were a guy. Until I remembered why I opened the door to women in the first place: to not limit the likelihood of finding that one person who'd complement me so completely. So here we are. I was thorough when I looked for you. And I feel justified lying in your arms, 'cause I got here on my own terms, and I have no question there was some place I didn't look. And for me that makes all the difference.

-Chasing Amy by Kevin Smith

GQ funny.

are you a dick? putz? weenie? penis? cock?

winters love.

a song that never stops giving.


the album that NEVER quits giving.

i've said it many times before and i may keep saying it long into the future. band of horses "cease to begin" is one of the few records i always want to listen to, never skipping a song. i'm really beating myself up for missing those end of the year shows now.

(PS -- happy birthday christina, baby!)


ladies who blog.



we all have days like this.

sorry i've been a bit MIA. lots of work to do before i leave for France...of course all i want to do is read, walk around town and eat glorious southern food. oh, and sleep. yeah. had to wake up at 7:30 this morning and after two weeks of sleeping in let me just tell you, it wasnt pretty. feeling odd being back in the office but will hopefully check off my to do list this week. last night saw Matt's 2 year ATL anniversary which we celebrated with drinks at a new bar. said goodbye to Shawn, if only for three weeks and eyed the suspicious return of a dear friends former lover. oh, how we torture each other. SOW, it seems a certain someone has left georgia without so much as a wave. i hope your sunny life is well composed, my dear. i promise its all sticky heart but sincere smiles from this spot.

and: got Ra's new book in the mail today. its out in a few months, if you can believe it. also waiting for the media blitz that will be Josh's tome. dudes, seriously need to get my books on the shelves, money to my lenders and my foot out of my mouth.